Tuesday, December 05, 2006

10 signs you drank too much the night before

1. You wake up at 6am. WIDE awake.

2. By the time the alarm clock goes off, you're in sleeping mode. It takes you a few whacks of said clock before you remember: when it shrieks at you, it's time to get up.

3. You forget (for once) that you cunningly set your clock 15 minutes ahead (months ago), and thus manage to get up in time anyway. Hooray!

4. You feel dizzy-ish when you stand up.

5. You remember leaving a self-pitying, self-indulgent comment on someone's blog at 1am.

6. You remember that you somehow posted it twice. You'd like to apologise, but you're too embarassed, as this will entail leaving YET ANOTHER COMMENT.

7. You are relieved rather than annoyed that you've left your bike at the train station. This means you can get a cab to the station. Walking not an option.

8. In the cab, you reach into your bag for your sunglasses and pull out a plastic wineglass.

9. Mental check: WHAT DID I SAY AND WHO DID I SAY IT TO? Nothing too bad springs to mind. But nothing too scintillating either.

10. You thank [Divine Being of choice] that you are happily partnered (married even!) and therefore don't have to worry about who you might have unwisely kissed or inappropriately flirted with.


audrey said...

I once unwisely mixed cheap wine with vodka and promptly blacked out. Unfortunately, we were taping the party to send to a friend overseas. There's nothing quite as bad as having your drunken hideousness captured on tape and having no recollection of having done any of it. Of course, you could then find out that you'd spilt coffee all through the host's spare bed and wandered around in your knickers for awhile.

Kate said...

My godawful far-too-conscious hungover awakenings tend to take place at 4am, and not 6am. I have solved this problem of late by simply falling asleep before I drink enough to become hungover. I am old. And sad.

meva said...

5. and 6. Sooooo embarrassing. Thank god noone one really knows me in bloggerville.

But I think no. 8 is my favourite!

Great post!

redcap said...

The plastic wine glass is gold :) And I feel your pain with the drunken commenting on blogs. Been there, stuffed that up.

These days, when I wake up on the morning after the night before, I have to think about who I had a barney with. I'm sorry to say that I've become very argumentative in my old age.

ThirdCat said...

You wake up at 6 am!

A dead giveaway. Every time.

Ariel said...

Audrey: That sounds hideous. I could perhaps counter the 'nothing quite so bad' and make you feel better ... but I have so many bad anecdotes to chosse from. That's a killer, though.

Kate: I think part of the reason I was so hungover that morning is that I so very rarely drink that much these days. I usually fall assleep/go home early too, these days.

Meva and Recap: I'm glad it's not just me who has done 5 and 8. It used to be ill-thought-out phone calls (then text messages) to love interests. Now it's just enroaching on other people's domains with my ramblings.

Third Cat: I do wonder: why is it that a hangover makes you wide awake at the very time you feel awful and most want to sleep? Divine punishment?

I have another Christmas party tonight ... arrgh!